Some people might read the title of this blog post and think I'm crazy. How could I possibly know your situation and whether you're safe or not, right?
Ok so I admit it: if you're in the jungle right now and a rhino is charging at you, then I am wrong and you are not safe. Please stop reading this article immediately and run to safety!
But most people reading this are physically safe right now. I'm sitting in my office typing this article, and I am in no physical danger whatsoever. There are no rhinos charging me. There are no bad guys nearby. Basically there is nothing in the vicinity that is trying to cause me physical harm.
The same is probably true for you too. So we are safe.
Now what if you just lost a bunch of money (maybe losses in the stock market, or a failed business venture, etc.). Are you still safe? The answer is if you look around and you are in no physical danger, then yes, you are still safe.
If the monetary losses are substantial, you might have to adapt to life with less money. You might have to move to a more affordable home and eat out less. Those things might be uncomfortable, but they are not putting you in danger. They are just changes to your lifestyle.
And certainly in the moment, right when you realize you have lost that money, you are still physically safe (unless there is a rhino nearby).
Again, I acknowledge that there are certainly exceptions. But on the whole, losing money doesn't put you in physical danger. It doesn't mean your life is at stake.
Why am I writing a blog post about this?
The reason is because for many people (including me sometimes), when we lose a chunk of money, we might feel a sense of panic. As if we're in danger. But in reality, we normally are not in any physical danger. And it turns out that it's very helpful to be aware of this fact at times like that.
Research has been done showing that humans typically have a few core needs in life. One of them is to be safe. When we feel safe, there is a sense of calm and wellbeing typically available to us.
And it turns out you can practice noticing how safe you are in order to deepen those senses. The more you practice and notice how safe you really are, the more you will be able to tap into that sense of calm and wellbeing. You can regularly stop and give attention to the fact that you are truly safe right now.
If you do that regularly, then it becomes natural for you to feel safe. Which is appropriate, considering that in our day-to-day lives, most of are physically safe the huge majority of the time.
So if that moment comes where you lose money for some reason or another, you can acknowledge your physical safety. That might allow you to tap into that sense of calm to at least some degree.
And then it's easier to be with the emotions that come up. You'll know that it's a fact that you are safe, and that therefore it's safe to feel those emotions (even if it doesn't feel safe!).
You might still be inspired to take action to remedy your financial situation, but that action doesn't have be born out of a state of panic or rage or any other extreme emotion. You'll know you're safe, and it might instill more wisdom into your decisions in the moment.
If you recently lost money and are encountering tough emotions, you are welcome to reach out to me. If nothing else, I can provide an ear to If you have any questions or feedback, I'd love to listen. And I'll support you no matter what you're going through. We can even talk by phone or Zoom if you want.
